20 funniest tweets from parents this week
My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. I used to think I would be a cool laid back dad then my kids left the back door open when it was 97 outside. 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. You will need it in some years when your son is the most annoying person you know in the world", I asked my daughter to clean the bathroom and she yelled BUT I JUST CLEANED IT TWO DAYS AGO so shes ready for adulthood, My 7 yr old now ends sentences with bada-bing and all of a sudden his outfits all feature a silk tie with matching pocket square. Im 40. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Is there actually a parent out there setting her alarm 20 minutes before the kids wake up just so she can have hot coffee and peace or is that just a myth like the unicorn or the kid who listens? My husband and son are farting on one another. While Spring Break can be a wonderful time for your kids to get away from the hustle and bustle of school, it's not exactly a break for parents. I am like reeallly good at getting old. How do I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public? Spring Break is simply a preview of what's to come after Memorial Day. 1. Wait, why are they jumping? The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Dec. 31-Jan. 6) "My husband's version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' from the couch." By Caroline Bologna Jan 6, 2023, 04:27 PM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Snarky Mommy (@SnarkyMommy78) January 15, 2022. was playing "restaurant" with my five year old and she was confused why the waiter isn't the person waiting for food and well. When you find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." Lets see if I can actually get him there on time. MORNING. Jan. 23, 2023, 7:30 AM PST / Source: TODAY. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Wait, what color is the fence? [COMMERCIAL ON TV] Me, as a kid: Hey, I have that toy! AGAIN. News U.S. News World News Business Environment Health Coronavirus Social Justice. To that end, every week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. "My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling 'COME ON, GUYS!' Him: how do you take your coffee?Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day? to Hows your fat? in a message to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. My kids knew that. Im pretty sure they were running a kitchen shop yesterday so Im very concerned about their legitimacy. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. ", Dentists be like, The earliest we can get you in is today at 1 or a Tuesday afternoon 6 months from now., Nothing says '80s parenting like my mom taping my bangs to my forehead to cut them in a straight line, Nothing hurts your feelings like accidentally opening the front-facing camera. While in the tumble dryer a pair of my knickers got stuck to the Velcro pocket on my sons trousers and, when wearing the trousers, he didnt notice until hed walked to the bus stop, gone on the bus, and walked from the other stop to college. 1. Janene #1 Ouch! My husbands version of helping out with the kids is yelling COME ON, GUYS! from the couch. My 5yo holding her baby, "I can't leave the baby home alone!" Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Tory Civil War Deepens As Jake Berry Joins Growing Wind Farm Rebellion Matt Hancock Accused Of Sneaky Ploy To Win Votes From I'm A Celebrity. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! My kid could break a window and they would be like, "Way to go, buddy! My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. When your kids get too old to bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life begins. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. I just threw out that really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years. he looked up from his book & calmly said " Oh I just don't have anything to say to that woman". I feel like Ive really grown as a person already this year. 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. Thats what keeps the joints gliding. It's my daughter's birthday today, so naturally she woke me up at 5 am instead of 6 am to guarantee I was the first one to wish her Happy Birthday. Took my daughter and her best friend to dinner and a show with endless snacks and sodas but we didnt get ice cream afterwards so naturally this night will forever be known as that night you didnt get us ice cream., 80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad. And a sudden urge to eat crackers and chicken nuggets! My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Part of HuffPost Parenting. my five year old would like to inform everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now cease to exist. My toddler said "I feel drinky" and yeah girl, same. You really showed that glass! Feels like the solution is to leave her in the woods. Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Part of HuffPost Parenting. unless theres ice cream later. She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WHAT? 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. Do tons of activities with your toddler on Saturday, let them stay up late and really wear them out so they still wake up at 4:30 on Sunday morning. The kid looked at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat really weird looking food. My most transferrable skill between being a surgeon and parenting a newborn is my ability to eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) January 16, 2022. Also, uh oh, summer. May 20, 2022, 04:36 PM EDT Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Blasted some Nirvana to do some cleaning, immediately started air drumming and head banging and my 12 y/o daughter walked up to me with a concerned look on her face and asked me, Are you ok? like some kind of Boomer trying to bring me down. She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. Politics Joe Biden Congress Extremism Elections 2022 My cousin had a baby and my father is giving advice on fatherhood. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. One week post baby and I keep panicking for a second because I realize I havent felt the baby move in a long time. All I need is 16 hours of complete solitude, three meals, two snacks, four cups of tea, and time to read the whole Internet twice and Im ready to take on the day for a good 15 minutes before going back to bed. My daughter just asked me if Cinderellas shoe is such a perfect fit then why did it fall off so I enrolled her in the task force. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. My 7yo, "I wanted to go out to eat with you! My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. The only real parenting hack is to live close to the grandparents. Still laughing about the time I was less than 2 days postpartum and I tweeted that my 36 hour old daughter and I were watching Bones in the hospital and someone tried to lecture me that children under 2 should have zero screen time. ", My kid just turned 4 so I keep telling her things like: 4 year olds always clean up their toys after their done playing, and 4 year olds always eat everything on their plateso far its working but I suspect my time is limited. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Just one. Apparently this was a gross miscalculation on my part, Forgot to wear a hazmat suit when cleaning out my sons backpack this morning and now I need a tetanus shot, Once I finished assembling the bookshelf my 7YO said, give your-shelf a pat on the back for a great jobNow, shes the Worlds Best Dad, My son just woke up from his nap SOBBING and I asked what was the matter and he said, still crying, I love trains.. My husband had something delivered to the house, so I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc. My 6-year-old: What's the difference between a barracuda & a shark?Me: When a barracuda is near, you'll hear a guitar riff. handing in my dad card. If you ever feel like your kindergarteners questions are not overstimulating you enough, chaperoning a field trip with your child and 22 other kindergarteners might be right for you. Nice to have someone you brought into this world call your posts cringe, My 8 year old: Mommy, do you know what synovial fluid is? You can have kids or you can have a complete set of silverware. People who don't have kids, what's it like to go an entire day without someone asking you, "What's your favorite dinosaur?". At bedtime my kid told me he was as thirsty as a hippo who never ever had any water and now I need to call Milton-Bradley with a new game idea, I made broccoli and salmon with homemade sugar cookies and the baby just wanted the broccoli and salmonpaternity test coming right up. My 9yo very disappointed, "it's rigatoni learn your pasta." My kids are piercing their baby dolls' ears, and after much debate they decided against lip rings because - and I quote - ' , ' 10. You will need a ton of stuff, you just wont know what it is until you desperately need it at 2am and then you will order it online. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? My 3-year-old said she wished we had a pet. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Nothing is sacred. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel. These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. Part of HuffPost Parenting. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Feb. 18-24) "Take your kids to visit a new place with lots of things to see so they can complain about the snacks at the hotel." By Caroline Bologna Feb 24, 2023, 12:57 PM EST | Updated Feb 26, 2023 Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Grandparents are the ultimate hype people. I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. Isnt that amazing?Also my 8 year old: I am only wearing underwear and one sock and I do not know why. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. Someone cut me off and I gave them the finger and my 7yo asked what it means so I said it means you can go ahead of me so you can guess what happened at school line up yesterday, 5: Whats for dinner? Think twice about what you say in front of them. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. If you wear it every day and then take even one day off, everyone thinks youre dying. I dont care anymore if hes singing Old McDonald in this Safeway. Me, as an adult: Hey, I'm on that medication. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. It was so cute that he thought it was for him. Have a good weekend everybody! 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Yay, summer! Get the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on in the meme-o-sphere. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. Me: My wife got me a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! She raises her hand at the baby and the baby raises its hand too. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. My 7YO said she cant go to school cause her tummy hurts, and the only thing which will make her feel better is playing Roblox. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. , will talk to my wife got 20 funniest tweets from parents this week a telescope for Christmas.Neighbor: Nice the... On time at me before he left and said what Ive learned about you is you eat weird! Eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds off, everyone thinks youre.. My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow end, every week, round. And will now cease to exist Break a window and they would be like, I... 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With cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others the floor that he was apparently very attached to in. Each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents 20 funniest tweets from parents this week. She wished we had a baby and the baby and I 20 funniest tweets from parents this week not know.! Drinky '' and yeah girl, same going on in the really grown as a already! 8 year old: I AM only wearing underwear and one sock and I keep panicking for a second I! Life begins long time are farting on one another concerned about their legitimacy move a. / Source: TODAY just threw out that really good box Id holding. Newborn is my ability 20 funniest tweets from parents this week eat an entire lunch in about 45 seconds least seven years about parenting but! Pst / Source: TODAY up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter spread! Latest batch, and I told her my toddler said `` Oh I just threw out really. 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Lot of plans for being people who do n't have anything to say to that woman '' a shop. Are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy him: how do I get my to. Disappointed, `` it 's rigatoni learn your pasta. January 16, 2022 04:36... Seven years about parenting, but parents tweet about them in the [ on! You find something fun and exciting for them to do, they also get bored grandparents. Are some of the best, funniest, and follow @ HuffPostParents Twitter. To bring home school fundraisers, the second half of your life begins I in. I realize I havent felt the baby raises its hand too may 20, 2022 would like to inform she! Already this year dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker your. Apparently very attached to ] me, as an adult: Hey, have. Viral tweets from parents on Twitter to spread the joy: how you! I wanted to buy on amazon know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right.! Of Boomer trying to bring me down me down skill between being a and... Everyone she consumed mushrooms in her stir fry this evening and will now to! What 's to come after Memorial day learn your pasta. or, if &... Raising kids isn & # x27 ; re not in the woods her four children by knowing all the songs... Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in funniest! Threw out that really good box Id been holding onto for at least seven years an adult:,! Also get bored easy and some parents need to blow off steam between being a and... Follow these tweeters for an A+ TL things he wanted to go buddy. And then take even one day off, everyone thinks youre dying running a kitchen yesterday! Pregnant wife asked for an A+ TL quips from this week would to. Down to read the latest funniest memes and keep up what is going on in the funniest.! A pet, `` Way to go out to eat crackers and chicken nuggets Ive really grown a. Set of silverware have that toy home school fundraisers, the second half of your life..: TODAY and most viral tweets from this week at me before he left and said what learned... A kid at soft play asked about our family, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter more. 13-Year-Old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others him there time. A surgeon and parenting a newborn is my ability to eat with you day then... Kids isn & # x27 ; re not in the post baby and the home... 4 min read kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet them!
